I sing the cabbie electric

Maybe sometimes I've been accused of having meaty paws—but let's face it, I'm a meaty, meaty man. Now, when it comes to meat, I'm pretty manly when it comes to eating a burger or something beefy, but when it comes to pork I kind of lose it and drop down a few notches into a kind of simpering, slightly effeminate art fag.

Sure, I've seen the movies, heard the albums and read the books. I'm able to ape the emotions of a normal, sensitive human being. "Pork chops are good," I hear you tell me. "Bacon is good." I'll give it up and admit that when I'm feeling exceptionally brave, I will eat bacon. But a pork chop? Are you fucking kidding me? Do I look like Bruce Willis or the Governator with a torn shirt and a machine gun dangling rolls of bullets? And don't even get started on Bratwurst.